K*nt F*cker

I was at a bar on Friday.  One of my friends says, “Hey Noah, there’s another philosopher here, come talk.”  So I go and chat.

She wrote a MA thesis on Levinas.  But somehow we got to ethics.  I started making fun of virtue ethics, which she believed in.  Something about me saying she had tomatoes being cultivated in her head got her riled up.  Since I had said I was unimpressed with Singer earlier, she figured me for a deontologist.

“You love rules.  You love following rules.. You looove Kant.  You want to fuck Kant.  You want to fuck Kant!”

This was said in a progressively louder voice, with the last sentence being heard by everyone.  For some reason it turned heads and made her friend think it was time to leave.

But not before I got her number.